The one thing I’ve heard over and over again about Gladiator II is, “This sequel didn’t need to get made.” Which is true, but if we know anything about Hollywood, it is that if they think they can make a buck on it, they’ll do it. Thus, 24 years after the original Gladiator film starring Russell Crowe (yes, his character is still dead), we get a followup. The fights in the coliseum are as entertaining as ever, but the rest of the film? Not so much.
In the beginning, we meet Hanno (Paul Mescal), living in northern Africa with his wife. Now, unless you’ve been living under a rock, the big “secret” was revealed a long time ago, in that the main character of this sequel is Lucius, the boy in the first film who was Lucilla’s son and in line to be the next Emperor of Rome. So I knew from the beginning that Hanno was really Lucius, and thankfully that fact gets divulged before long, even if the movie tries to make it seem earth shattering when the news drops (maybe next time, don’t hype that in the previews). Anyway, Hanno’s wife is killed in an attack from Rome, and Hanno is captured as a slave. He vows revenge on the Roman general who led the attack, General Acacius (Pedro Pascal), but what Hanno doesn’t know is Acacius is his step-daddy, having long ago married Lucilla. Acacius is actually one of the good guys, who hates the corruption that encompasses Rome and who wants to see it returned to the will of the people.
Hanno’s owner, Macrinus (Denzel Washington), promises him that, if he fights well in the colosseum, he will be given the opportunity to kill Acacius, so Hanno jumps at the opportunity. Blood baths ensue, and those fights are the best part of this movie. We’ve got some crazy ape-like things, we’ve got 5-on-1 lopsided affairs, and even one fight where they covered the colosseum floor in water and brought in sharks. Those crazy Romans. Along the way, Hanno becomes popular with the crowds, and less popular with the co-Emperors, Geta and Caracalla, each of whom are batshit crazy. If Hanno lives long enough, he may be able to see Rome come to a better place.
This film is sort of a hot mess. Lots doesn’t make any sense at all, and while I expected director Ridley Scott to play loose with the facts, you might as well make up some names rather than using historical figures in the movie, because their timelines don’t line up with real life. Even putting that aside, the film can be downright boring at times, and that’s never a good thing for an action film. Some of the better actors give it their all though, which saves some moments, and again, that arena fighting is worth the price of admission. As the tagline from the first movie states, “Are you not entertained?” For me, I was some of the time. ★★½
Jons Movie Takes 